Angel Babies

Melanie's little girl, Summer, isn't doing well. The funeral for her twin, Brooke, has been postponed. It was supposed to be today.

I have angel babies. Born too soon, too small to survive. Two little girls and a little boy. Does the pain ever go away? No. But time does soften it. For us, it's been decades. We'd have a daughter 28, another 27 and a son 22 if things had gone the way we'd hoped.

I am extremely grateful for the children I have. They have been, and still are, a great comfort. All grown up now, of course, they are still willing (when they are around) to tolerate hugs from ol' Mom.

Here is a poem I found all those years ago that touched my heart.


To a Child Gone by Carol Lynn Pearson

I thought I was ahead of you in line.
You would take your turn
After I took mine.
Like we did before.

I guess you don't need new shoes
For starting heaven,
Or a light left on against the dark
The way I always did.
But I'm so used to parenting,
I wanted just to be there--
To do whatever needed to be done.

But you went first.
And now, my little one,
Suddenly you are my senior.
Morning, I know, will come.
But, bring closer your light--
This time it is I who fear the night.


I know families are forever and I'll see my angel babies again someday. There have been times when I have struggles and the thought of those children, already waiting for me, has given me the little added push I've needed. They've already crossed the finish line and are cheering me on, "Come on, Mom, you can do it!" Be a little stronger, endure a little longer, be the kind of person I know I need to be. Work a little harder at it! I want to be with them again someday. I want my babies back. Morning will come. Families are forever. I want my sweet husband and all our children...and their spouses...and their children...all together again. We don't lose our loved ones, just because death separates us temporarily. I guess I should insert here, if you are curious about my beliefs, you can check them out at www.lds.org There is more to life than the here and now. But sometimes, the here and now is really tough..and hurts so much, you think your heart really will break into pieces...

Hugs and prayers for Melanie and her family.